Exam season may not be exactly around the corner, but it’s not that far away either, and no doubt students, parents and teachers are starting to think ahead.
Certainly, pastoral leads will know well that problems linked to exams can start to occur from this time onwards. These might include stress and anxiety around exams, while other issues - such as simmering social strains among friends - can ignite in this heightened time.
As someone who has been in a pastoral and wellbeing role for over a decade, it is a period of the school year I know well. Here is some tried and tested advice to stay the course and provide the best support possible.
1. Keep calm
In moments of stress, how you respond sets the tone. Whether it’s a student in tears over mock results or a parent anxiously emailing late at night, staying calm will help others do the same.
People mirror the energy you bring into a situation - if you remain composed and measured, it helps to de-escalate emotions and encourage rational thinking.
A moment of pause before responding can make all the difference.
2. You are not alone
Pastoral roles can be emotionally draining, and the responsibility can take its toll. It’s easy to feel like you’re carrying everything on your shoulders, but you don’t have to do it alone.
Seeking support from colleagues, mentors or external agencies isn’t a sign of weakness - it’s a sign of good leadership.
Leaning on those around you not only strengthens your ability to help others but also ensures you have the support you need to keep going.
3. Self-care is critical
Linked to this is the importance of looking after yourself. Pastoral roles can be emotionally draining, and the weight of responsibility can take its toll.
Setting boundaries, knowing when to step back, and making time for your own wellbeing isn’t a luxury - it’s essential. A burnt-out pastoral leader is no help to anyone.
4. Enjoy the small wins
Pastoral leadership isn’t always about dramatic, life-changing interventions.
Sometimes, the biggest impact comes from the smallest moments - a student choosing to open up for the first time, a child who usually avoids school actually making it through the door, or a quiet thank you from someone who appreciates your support.
Not every success will be immediate or obvious, but recognising and celebrating these small wins keeps you going.
5. You can’t fix everything
No matter how much you care, you won’t be able to solve every problem.
Some students will continue to struggle despite your best efforts, and some situations will remain complex no matter how many interventions are put in place.
Recognising this is crucial for your own wellbeing. The role of a pastoral leader isn’t to have all the answers but to provide support, guidance and access to the right resources. Accepting this can help ensure you stay grounded whatever occurs.
Final thoughts
Pressure points in the academic calendar, such as exam season, can feel overwhelming for both new and experienced pastoral leaders alike. But by focusing on what really matters, you’ll navigate this period far more effectively.
The students you support might not always say it now, but they will remember the reassurance, the encouragement and the belief you had in them when they needed it most. That’s the true impact of pastoral leadership.
Ian Watts is Assistant Head of Secondary (Student Wellbeing and Community) at The International School @ ParkCity, Kuala Lumpur
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